M E M O R A N D U M
|My photo. I bet not many
people send you animated ones!
To: You, the owner of this particular dot store
From: Dorothy A. Ellipsis, New Recruit
Date: June 8, 2014
Subject: My Introduction and Various Improvements Made to the Store
My name is Dorothy A. Ellipsis and I was hired as part of your “My Store Sucks, Someone Help Me Make It Better” initiative. I believe my previous experience as a “Lowercase I and J Quality Assurance Specialist” and my through understand of the book 44 Things Successful Dot Marketers Do While Sunbathing will make me a tremendous asset to your team. I am super excited to start working! In fact, I was so excited that I already rolled out some improvements to the store!
The old cursor was too expensive to replace when it broke. (It was like that when I got here! I swear!) They were high-resolution models that were made up of many dots, and have you seen the price of dots lately?! So, I decided to order another that are made of less dots and cheaper to maintain. I struck a deal with the distributor where if we put an order for the standard arrow cursor, they would throw in an animated wait cursor at no additional cost. A team of highly-trained stealth renovators have been dispatched to install the new cursors and they should be ready when you arrive at your store for your next shift.
Faster news tickers
I’ve heard of slow news days, but I thought the old tickers were ridiculous. I gave the order to install new tickers with dot presses that work
50% 100% faster. Now you can spend less time reading the news and more time conducting business. If you’re really in a hurry, you can put them into overdrive by clicking and holding anywhere on the news screen.
As the owner of your own business, you don’t have the time to deal with petty things like remembering to save your game every once in a while, and quite frankly, I don’t want to do it either. That’s why I hired a Records Saving Technician, who will update your business records at the end of each business day. The Tech Guy (I don’t remember his name) only comes in at closing, so he won’t get in your way of your daily routine and, for all intents and purposes, is invisible.
If you want the boring
version, you can read it here: Changelog
In addition to these changes, I’ve come up with a few other ideas we could do to improve the store further:
Game Jolt integration
I’ve heard about your problem with your business records and cash box being put out on the curb with the trash. I won’t pry into how this could even happen, but I’ve come up with a solution that may help. We can backup all our data onto servers run by this company called Game Jolt, and lucky for us they also offer banking services so we can put all our extra cash with them too. I’ll get the Tech Guy to work on it right away! Sure, I didn’t put this in his job description, but I’m sure he won’t mind the extra work without compensation.
I’m seeing great potential in using Game Jolt’s data storage in other areas. I’ll send out another memo when I get the details all worked out.
Dorothy A. Ellipsis, New Recruit
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